In 2016, This Guy IS the Most Alternative Guy at Summerfest

I don’t know his name. He was just a random fat guy in an extra, extra, extra large t-shirt that read “Clinton Lewinsky 2016” and had some crude carnal phrase in smaller print below that. He was wearing a Donald Trump baseball cap that may have said “make America great again”, and he reassured me repeatedly that he was dead serious about his support for Trump. And he was super stoked about having already voted for him in the primary.

The fat guy’s sister was nicer-looking (a fraction his size), sweet, and kinda quiet, but she quietly let on that she was her brother’s opposite in too many ways to count. She seemed like she’d be a real cool person to make friends with if I were in college and actually had time for friends and cool shit like that.

Their mom was with them. Their mom is 43 years old, real cheerful, pleasant, and supportive of each of her very different young adult children. I told the mom that I’m 40 years old. We exchanged high school information and memories from past rock scenes in Houston. Remember when Lollapalooza seemed so radical just because of racial mixing, a few tattoos, and some minor body piercing? One of us asked the other one that, and then we discussed how her flamboyantly Republican son was now more alternative than a guy with facial tattoos, a mohawk, or even those ear lobe stretching ear rings.